RE: [Epic] Fw: A fluffy trifle

From: Ian Haskins <Ian_Haskins_at_...>
Date: Tue, 22 Sep 1998 10:52:59 +0100

Any interesting stuff,

discussions on the new 40K?

Tactics?
House Rules?

or is it all fluff.....

Can you let me have the Majordomo/listerv command to subscribe (their
majordomo server does not appear to have heard of 40k-list)


> ----------
> From: Geoff Kemp[SMTP:geoffkemp_at_...]
> Reply To: space-marine_at_...
> Sent: Tuesday, September 22, 1998 9:44 AM
> To: space-marine_at_...
> Subject: [Epic] Fw: A fluffy trifle
>
> This is just a quick example of the sort of stuff that appears on the 40K
> list
>
> Geoff Kemp
> On the Eighth day God Created the TCP/IP protocol...
>
> geoffkemp_at_...
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Mike Schwitzgebel <mschwitz_at_...>
> To: 40k list <40k-list_at_...>
> Date: 21 September 1998 21:36
> Subject: A fluffy trifle
>
>
> >
> > "Okay, Lucy," Ray muttered to himself. "Up and at 'em."
> > Techmarine Raymond Orville Vaque allowed himself a tight smile of
> >satisfaction, as his ministrations were gradually rewarded by the myriad
> small
> >ticking, whirring, thunking sounds of a dreadnought powering up from
> standby.
> > "Vlllllllllt hnn grhgghhh--"
> > "Hey!" the techmarine shouted, rapping a force spanner against the
> cyborg's
> >hull. "Calibrate the voice processors, buddy. How many times do I--"
> > BLAAAAAT!!
> > Ray jumped as Lucifer sounded the gleaming air horns that had been a
> gift
> from
> >the men of Cleansing Flames' 2nd Company, a few birthdays past. Within
> the
> >steel and concrete confines of the Dread Shed (as the dreadnought barn
> was
> >affectionately known), the din was deafening.
> > "Mind the finish, Nancy," Lucifer warned, his momentary vocal glitch
> resolved.
> > The synthesised voice somehow managed to sound, at once, coldly
> metallic
> and
> >amused.
> > "Yeahyeah," Ray growled, "good morning to you, too. Look, we finished
> >repacking your knee joints, yesterday. I need you to move around on them
> a
> bit
> >so we can make sure they're right. Okay?"
> > Several long moments passed as the dreadnought seemed to consider the
> request.
> > Then, he slowly raised one foot off the concrete floor and stood
> balanced
> on
> >the other, like one of those trained circus elephants he'd once seen in
> an
> old
> >holovid. This would get Brother Ray's hearts pounding.
> > The techmarine rolled his eyes and grimaced.
> > "If you fall and break a leg..."
> > "...don't come running to me," the dreadnought finished. "Not bad, but
> don't
> >let the Inquisition catch you unclenching like that."
> > "Do you mind? Can't we just get on with it?"
> > Lucifer lowered his foot and took a few tentative steps. He moved with
> a
> >deceptive grace which, despite his immense bulk, was belied only by
> >transmission of the impacts through the floor. Satisfied, he strode a
> short
> >distance and back, the thud of his footfalls echoing slightly in the
> cavernous
> >barn. He backed into his docking bay and stood flexing his refurbished
> knee
> >joints in an unlikely parody of knee bends.
> > "Thanks, Doc. That's much better."
> > "I should think so. You must have got a couple kilos of that black
> Elyrian
> >sand in the old joints. Bloody things were ground down to .936 of proper
> >spec."
> > "What can I say?" Lucifer said, swinging his power fist in an
> instinctive
> >gesture that had survived his several centuries as a dreadnought, not to
> >mention the pleas of his brother marines. "Sand and sun. I needed to
> work
> on
> >my tan."
> > Waiting for a response from Brother Ray, but receiving none, Lucifer
> >explained, "It's a joke. Needed to work on my tan... get it?
> > Ray crossed his arms and just stared at his recalcitrant charge.
> Lucifer
> was
> >something of an oddity among dreadnoughts, in that he had retained much
> of
> his
> >personality and mental vigor, long past the point at which most began to
> lose
> >interest in the world around them. Within the dreadnought's sarcophagus
> was
> >encased the broken, withered husk of a seven hundred and something year
> old
> >space marine, and within that husk still thrived most of the best parts
> of
> >Brother Bob Hoskins. Ray tried not to think about it too much, because
> he
> just
> >couldn't reconcile the atrocious puns and lewd limericks with the ruined
> body
> >that lay within.
> > To the amazement of the Adeptus Mechanicus, Lucifer clung tenaciously to
> his
> >relationships with his brother marines--more than a few of whom secretly
> feared
> >him. His concern over the state of his consciousness was fanatic,
> prompting
> >him to frequently ask, "How do I seem today?" In truth, Ray rather
> enjoyed
> the
> >notoriety of his assignment to this roguish cyborg, but there were times
> when
> >his unusual exuberance got in the way.
> > Sobered by the techmarine's mood, Lucifer switched gears.
> > "How long has it been, this time?
> > Ray tapped a few keys on his pad, consulting the maintenance records.
> "Almost
> >a year."
> > "Something's bothering you. You didn't bring me up just so I could
> stretch my
> >legs, did you?"
> > "No." Against all logic, it was Hoskins' eyes Ray felt burning into him
> from
> >behind the dreadnought's visual sensors. "We've received orders. 2nd
> >Company's shipping out, ASAP, to put down an Ork incursion on Corelli VI.
> >You're going."
> > Lucifer inclined his upper torso slightly, which Ray knew to be a nod.
> > "Well then, best get me strapped and packed," came Lucifer's reply.
> "It's
> not
> >like my social calendar is full."
> > Giving the sarcophagus an affectionate slap, Ray nodded and began his
> >checkout.
> > "So... this Blood Claw walks into a pub with a sheep under one arm, and
> >a--stop me if you've heard this one..."
> >
> >
>
Received on Tue Sep 22 1998 - 09:52:59 UTC