[Epic] Jervis' Letter

From: Keith Zanardi <xenofobe_at_...>
Date: Fri, 28 Feb 1997 12:11:20 -0500 (EST)

>Return-Path: Kitzman_at_...
>Date: Fri, 28 Feb 1997 09:40:03 -0600
>X-Sender: kitzman_at_...
>To: Keith Zanardi <xenofobe_at_...>
>From: Kitzman_at_... (Harvey H. Kitzman, Jr.)
>Subject: Re: Epic Squats (long)
>
> Keith, thought you would like this. Could you pass it along to your
freinds on the
> SM mailing list? Some might not appreciate it, so for all of you that are
offended,
   delete it!
>
>
>Horus, Boy these guys are *&%holes. I died laughing when I saw your
>comments. Thanks for sending it.
>
>
>
>Recently Jerkis Johnson sent this to one of the 40K list, so I thought that
>the SM interested people of this list might find this informative.
>
>Epic Squats - I *really* wish that didn't sound like something you get
>after going for fifteen pints and a curry, but it does! And that, in a
>funny way, is the problem.
>
>But I'm getting ahead of myself. I note that many of you have heard that
>Squats are not included in the army lists in the new Warhammer Epic 40,000
>game, and are worried that this means that we're writing them out of the
>40K universe for good.
>
>Well, don't worry, the Squats have not gone for good, they are simply on a
>back-burner.
>
>
> That's nice, like Epic for the last 3 years. Yes we have loved the
>overabundance of Epic Articles in the White Dwarfs prior to the revival of
>the game. The whole 2 pages you gave us justified the $5.00 price, NOT!!!
>
> We've done this because, to be blunt, we *hate* the background
>for the Squats in 40K, especially the way it makes what should be a proud
>and noble race come across as pint-sized bikers who are the lackies of the
>Imperium.
>
>
> Orwellian. Rewrite the history so it conforms to what you want. Kind of
>like
> the historical "revisionists" in this country.
> War is Peace. Ignorance is Strength. Freedom is Slavery.
>
>Now, I don't know about you, but we think that the Squats deserve a lot
>better than this.
>
> Yeh! They deserve to be in the *%#^ing game. Now! HK: Amen, Brother!
>
>
> We think they deserve to be a race that _demands_
>respect, and can get it! However, in order to do this we need to come up
>with a spin on the Squat background that generates that respect, while at
>the same time leaving the bulk of the exisiting background intact.
>
>
> Bullshit!
>
>Fortunately, Andy C, talented fellow that he is,
>
> A nobody that sneaked in GW's back door when you were on one of your
>"sabbaticals"
> Now he runs the show. Just the guy I want working with me.
> Yah, Mr. "I love epic SO much" Where the hell were you when "sales were
sagging"?
>
> has come up with a very
>nice short story that manages to achieve just that, and which will serve as
>the basis for the new Squat Codex *when we get a chance to write it*.
>
>
> You JUST said he had the "new" story! &*%$ing print it! Amen, brother!
>
>
>
>
>And there's the rub, because the amount of work the Squats will require for
>us to achieve what we want is considerably greater than would be required
>to just 'bash out' a codex based on the exisiting background. Realistically
>this means that we won't be able to get out the Squat Codex for a year or
>two yet, and possibly longer.
>
> Like they have OTHER more important things to do, like, ANOTHER Chaos
> or Space Marine Codex, mmmm, the Prune Eaters Chapter (followers of Nurgle)
> the ones who scourge worlds in search of diaretics.
>
>
><Ducks for cover as Squat players scream in
>anguish>
>
> You can't hide from a 12 gauge, *&%hole!
> Meanwhile I'm sitting on an army of expensive paperweights.
>Make this your number one priority, *&%HOLES! It's bad enough that you
>greedy English expect us to bend over and buy a new game so you can
>line your wallets, but to deliberately delete a great army? NOT EVERY EPIC
>PLAYER PLAYS 40K!!!! IN FACT SOME OF US WILL NEVER PLAY 40K JUST TO PISS
>YOU OFF!!!!!
>
>
>
> Yes I know, I know, it's a long time. But what do you think we
>should do: rush out a Codex we won't be happy with just 'cause there's a
>demand for it?
>
>
> Why not? Hell, you did it with Titan Legions!
>
>
>
>; or wait until we've got time to do it right?
>
>
> The only thing GW has done "right", is Man O War. THAT was a good game.
>
> Notice I said WAS.
>
> GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASSES AND DO IT NOW!!!!!!!
>
>Well, we've elected for waiting until we got enough time to do the Squat
>Codex right, and *that's* why there are no Squats in Epic. Basically, until
>we've done the Codex we can't write the Epic army lists.
>
> Oh bullshit!
>
> On the other hand,
>this means that the Squat Codex will include an appendix
>
> this means you pay $30+ for the LAST 2 pages in the book.
>
>with the Epic army
>lists, becoming the first 40K/Epic 40K dual-purpose Codex!
>
> OOOOOoooo! sounds so cool! Can I come to your house and play?
>
>
>Hope tht helps, I feel SO much better now. Yah, kind of like I feel after
I get
> off the throne!
>
>Jerkis (Isn't that JerVis?)
>
>jerkisj_at_... (fitting address)
>
> I thought it was jerkisj_at_....
>weholdall.ofyouincontempt/andwearegoing~tobleedyoudry.ofallyour/money.dumbasses
>
>Glad to hear that Jerkis is back (sort of). He also sent another email
>discussing his absence for the afore mentioned list and his current status
>within GW. If anyone is interested I can forward that one to this list as
>well.
>
>
> No thanks, I can hardly keep on my toes now as it is!
>
> Squat players of the world unite. You have nothing to lose but the
>stupidity of Games Workshop! The way you guys run your company its no
>wonder we KICKED YOUR ASSES in two wars!
Received on Fri Feb 28 1997 - 17:11:20 UTC

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